Way back in prehistoric 2005, five of us gathered in Brisbane and had a great deal of fun filming a surreal mockumentary sketch show. Hours of footage were flown back to Western Australia, compiled into the Greatest Trailer That Ever Trailed, then stashed in the director’s bottom drawer, where they presumably remain to this day.
Lo! With the recent chance discovery of a long lost test reel and some painstaking restoration work in Windows Movie Maker, this magnum opus can finally take its rightful place as the literal Citizen Kane of movies.
We at The Rubber Chicken have long considered the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon a few edits and a laugh track away from being the perfect sitcom. Even the voice actors openly recognise villains Krang and Shredder as the classic bickering married couple. Now if only somebody would get rid of those pesky turtles, we could finally enjoy TMNT as the romantic adventure-comedy it was clearly destined to be.
Perhaps for the first time ever in the history of this flea-bitten enterprise, we hit you with a one-two punch of Actual Content. A project, if you will, that ended on a To Be Continued…and was then actually continued. The very next day, no less.
I know, I know – tis a sign of the End Times to be sure. But as the comet passes overhead and we all slip into our tasteful scuba gear in preparation for the great tidal wave, spare a thought for part 2 of Movie Adventure – the thrilling, action-packed conclusion to a film that lowers expectations, and then exceeds them with average performance.
Once and again, we men of the Chicken Frontier like to engage in projects that deviate from the standard Celebrity-Hassling and Inside-Joke-Peddling on which the mighty monolith you gaze upon right now stands built.
With this in mind, several billion years ago I, Dr. Andrey Summers stD, exuded a short script entitled “Movie Adventure”. Blood, sweat, toil, and inconvenient scheduling ensued, but inevitably resulted in a product that I am actually kind of fond of, if I do say so myself.
And I’m not sure, but I think I do. Or did. At some point. IN ANY CASE! Below lie the tedious, serpentine cliches of MOVIE ADVENTURE! PART ONE! It has, of course, been warped from its original wide-screen nature by some foul trick of idiot compression…but haven’t we all, in our youth? Hark:
Andrey: TRC’s readership is many things. One of those things is a viewership. And with that in mind, we present the first in a series of Televised Segments that you – the fans – Implicitly Demanded in the Wiki. Not only is this more evidence of how interactive, and mindful of our public we are, it’s also an embarrassing indication of our insufferable tendency to pander.
Most of all, however, it’s a highly amusing bit of collaboration with Local Celebrity Adam Pateman, whose standup comedy you can procure on YouTube, and let’s face it – probably should.
The next installment of Perry’s Picnic will be appearing as soon as you ingest this one, and if you like it, say so in the so-called Forums and we’ll see what we can do with regards to pandering some more. A higher-quality version of the vid is available on the YouTube page right under the abominably low viewer-count.
The classic Ninja Turtles series as it was meant to be seen.
Follow us on
Did You Know?
Mad Magazine’s Star Trek Spectacular contains enough information on the franchise’s history that you can comfortably feign pop-culture wisdom without ever needing to watch Star Trek. This technique has been known to backfire. Remember, his name is not really “Schlock”.