Before we embraced the world of sound with - let's not lie here - a pretty boot-bottomly bitchin' podcast, we had several less advisable attempts at musicianship.
To hear some competently produced tunes, go here.
For the sketch comedy show into which we pour our very souls, click here.
For everything else, read on.
While we had a lot yet to learn in the ways of musical timing and audio editing, we hope you still enjoy these tracks in the intended spirit of amateurish fun.
Download Full EP (6.10mb RAR archive)
Lee Thomas: The Saga in Song
Narrated by Chad. Compiled by Alastair.
A musical tribute to our favourite reader (previously immortalised in the medium of the moving picture).
The backing track is lifted from the promotional children's single "Seymour Rock" (Seymour, as you know, being the terrifying CGI frog mascot of Overflow, the now-defunct North Queensland, Australia bargain warehouse chain). Out of respect to the original copyright holder, we have also included the oddly alluring original song.
Ocean in my Head
Ocean in my Head
By Chris and Alastair.
Chris vows to push listeners into madness with concentrated catchiness. Succeeds.
Download MP3
I've got the ocean in my head.
And the seagull's flying round and round and round my brain.
And the seagull's flying round and round my bra-ai-ain.
I've got the ocean in my head.
And there's people swimming round the beach inside my brain.
And there's people swimming round the beach inside my brain.
I've got the ocean in my head.
And sometimes I like to disco dance when I'm in there.
And sometimes I like to disco dance oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah.
I've got the ocean in my head.
And you'll never find the bodies hidden inside my walls.
And you'll never find the bodies hidden inside my walls.
I've got the ocean in my head.
And I'm watching you with the camera hidden inside your wall.
And I'm watching you with the camera hidden inside your wall.
I've got the ocean in my head.
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Yo Ho! (The Nietzsche Pronunciation Seafaring Blues)
By Chris and Alastair.
Friedrich Nietzsche might be a household name, but does anyone really know how to pronounce it? We took on the issue head-on through an impossible-to-ignore medium: the sea shanty. This song launched Nietzsche Pronunciation Awareness Week in July 2005.
Download Sea Shanty
Download Hip-Hop Reprise
Chorus:
Yo ho, yo ho, yo ho, yo ho,
Yo ho, yo ho, Nietzsch-ah or Nietzsch-ee
Frankly we don't have a clue
Yo ho, yo ho, Nietzsch-ah or Nietzsch-ee
We suspect neither do you
Yo ho, yo ho, Nietzsch-ah or Nietzsch-ee
(Repeat Chorus)
We'd appreciate your help.
Yo ho, yo ho, Nietzsch-ah or Nietzsch-ee
Try and find a rhyme for "help"
Yo ho, yo ho, Nietzsch-ah or Nietzsch-ee
(Repeat Chorus)
For the standard in-joke now
Yo ho, yo ho, Nietzsch-ah or Nietzsch-ee
Steak and mushroom pie contains cow
Yo ho, yo ho, Nietzsch-ah or Nietzsch-ee
(Chorus, Fade Out)
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"Screwed"
Originally written by Kara DioGuardi and Gregg Wells.
Originally performed by Haylie Duff in 2003, and by Paris Hilton in 2004.
Re-imagined by Glancy.
When Paris Hilton and Hillary Duff's Less Popular Sister became entangled in a legal dispute over the rights to perform the song "Screwed", we enlisted our own resident musician, Andrew "Glancy" McIlvaney, to form his own interpretation of the lyrics.
We later received the following, very encouraging feedback from songwriter Greg Wells:
"My cowriter Kara and I had never imagined that our little pop song could sound so... well... unique! Definitely a braver rendering than any pop diva could give. Bravo, Glancy."
The Rubber Chicken does not recommend actually listening to this under any circumstances.
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The Studio Sessions
Musical comedy of such high calibur we were forced to quarantine everything else in here.
Podcast Season Two
The difficult second album.
Podcast Season One
The charmingly naive first album.
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 | | | |  |  | | | If someone says “Consider what you’d regret not having done if the world ended today, and go and do those things tomorrow!” do not do this. It’s better to regret not doing something than to regret doing it.
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