In this bonus episode: another collection of outtakes tasteless even by our standards.
In the interests of public safety and social conscience, the audio recording described as “The Rubber Chicken Podisode #2″ carries the following content warnings:
HIMN: Horendous Improvised Musical Number MS: Medium-level Movie Spoilers BoP: Bag of Puppies DAO: Strong Discrimination Against Orphans SNH: Sir Nigel Haversmith CAWE: Conversation About Wine and Ears S-D: Mild Splicey-Dicey sequence that may be unsuitable for small children
This Podisode has been classified with a rating of RU (Reprehensible and Unreleasable). If you believe this rating to be in error, an appeal can be submitted in writing to forums.thatchickensite.com.
Oftentimes, we wonder: what aren’t they showing us on the television? When we see American troops marching triumphantly through some deserted part of Iraq that isn’t actually of strategic importance, where is the TRUTH being hidden?
No doubt you often think along the same lines when considering the 1990′s Ninja Turtles cartoon.
Seven Samurai and Pokemon The Movie 2000: The Power of One
When I first saw Akira Kurosawa’s quintessential samurai film, I was expecting a masterpiece of cinema; a heart-wrenching epic; something to make me laugh, cry and cheer all at once. What I wasn’t expecting was a shot-for-shot remake of the second animated Pokemon motion picture.
“We arent really new. We’ve been kicking like a mutated cow for nearly 3 years now, and I think we’re finally recieving the attention we deserve.”
Ahh, Rare-Extreme. “Sharply written”, “witty” and “reliable” are but a few adjectives one could easily place next to their name with the aid of any functional writing instrument or word processor. The technology is there, and we aren’t in a position to stop you.
Over the years R-E have made contact with many reliable inside sources, promising the secret behind Banjo-Kazooie’s infamous “Stop ‘N’ Swop” feature (but never revealing it), confirming Perfect Dark 2′s appearance at E3 2002 (which never showed it), and even scoring a tour of Rare HQ. Yes, they’ve done it all. We at The Rubber Chicken might have had occasional creative differences with Rare-Extreme, but it doesn’t mean we don’t respect them as fellow journalists. Sometimes a gentleman must swallow his pride and give credit to his enemies. In the following exposé, we hope to establish their credibility once and for all.
Today is the sixteenth day of the month – Do Something Controversial Day – a day in ‘Chicken town usually reserved for childish and spiteful pranks. But this time, we’ll make an exception.
As many of you know, several key members of The Rubber Chicken have past affiliations with the fan community of videogame developers Rare. Somewhere along the way, our former websites fell into rivalry with the kids at Rare-Extreme.com. But today, my friends… today we concede defeat.
Rare-Extreme recently obtained the impossible: a guided tour of Rare HQ itself, and posted a fascinating, well-written talisman of fine journalism on this incredible once-in-a-lifetime experience. To show there are no longer any hard feelings between us, and to make up for any past bitterness, we offer the following reconciliatory plug their fine website. Check it out now, y’all.
Alastair: Remember ? You know, Ben’s quirky, insightful and (hah!) weekly series adding dialogue from old LucasArts adventure games to real-world photos? If not, I know what you’re thinking: what a delightful idea! There is absolutely no chance of this offending anybody!
One man defied those expectations. One man broke the shackles and challenged us. Today we pay tribute to this man – this hero – the only way we know how: with an insane and the not-at-all defamatory Flash animation from Bungholio.
A recap of the Arctic White Campaign, The Rubber Chicken’s month-long crusade to rig a breakfast cereal election.
As you are no doubt aware, the Australian division of Kellogg’s Cereal let us, Froot Loop eating public, choose the new colour to join the green, orange, red and yellow we all know and love. Always the equal opportunity campaigners, we began a movement to elect the least likely candidate: Arctic White. For every day of the last month, The Rubber Chicken’s readers and writers have been casting multiple votes for this wonderfully mundane colour hundreds of times over.
Sadly, but not surprisingly, Kellogg’s couldn’t handle the results. Today, the false glory is heaped upon Sky Blue.
With this outright robbery of our democratic rights, our dreams are shattered. Shattered like glass. Glass under an elephant’s foot. The foot of the elephant of manipulative multinational cereal companies. An elephant which has eaten peanuts. The peanuts of rigged election results. Grown in a peanut farm of LIES!
A guest essay by Ethel J. Roberts, Author & Critic.
I recently paid a visit to my local shopping centre to confront my local supermarket about the price of a recently-purchased jar of rhubarb, and was sick and disgusted at what I found. Hundreds of children, all lining up like lemmings for the new instalment of The Adventures of Harry Potter: Boy Wizard. This controversial book series has been boycotted by tens of millions of readers worldwide for its promotion of witchcraft. Despite the overwhelming pressure on bookstores and libraries to ban the series, the authorities continue to sit by idly while our youth are secretly corrupted and brainwashed with blatantly pagan and un-Christian ideals.
The classic Ninja Turtles series as it was meant to be seen.
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If Shaun Micallef were reading this website, he would almost certainly have his computer switched on. (And at this point, he’d go “Hm. Opening statement leads to mundane digression. Where have I heard humor like that before?”)