Like a killer wasp in an out-of-place simile, The Rubber Chicken Store is active once more.
First amongst the new batch is the Land of Canoes Torso Concealer. Such is the overpowering chirpiness of this colourful, yet tastefully understated t-shirt that drawing it physically gave cartoonist extraordinaire Andy “Klobber” Webb a headache. Don’t let his sacrifice go unrewarded – order today!
Update: By popular demand (hi Mum), the shirt is now also available in a naughty-word-free version, for those who prefer their t-shirts obscenely colourful but not colourfully obscene. Conservative but flamboyant gay men now have no reason not to own one. Jawsome!
Next on the rolecall is the timeless Quack Cap, now with a freshly revised URL and 50% more timelessness. You’ve learned why the sun shines, now shield yourself from the answer!
And, er, if it’s all the same with you, I’d rather not talk about the third item. Some scars take longer to heal than others.
For a celebrity, former Rubber Chicken contributor Blake Barham is remarkably humble. His brief stint at the late Nintendo Gamer magazine (a gig, I confess, that has attracted some jealousy from the rest of us) propelled him into a world of well-endowed cars and fast women. Yet he still finds the time to look back acknowledge those who helped him in the early days.
One such gesture arrived on my birthday. And by “gesture”, I mean “packet of Growing Pains trading cards from 1988″, complete with seventeen-year-old bubble gum. Thus began the adventure of a lifetime.
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here is a pic of mittensthe cat doing a cute li:ttle dance with [COPYRIGHTED TITLE REMOVED] my favorite [COPYRIGHTED FRANCHISE REMOVED] isnt he the cutest little cat eva?
Order your Mittens Mug today!
More items in the Rubber Chicken Store
If there’s one thing you can’t accuse George Lucas of, it’s poor marketing. The merchandising blitz promoting The Phantom Menace was huge – even larger if you happened to be an ant at the time. Even so, certain Star Wars merchandise fell by the wayside, gathering dust faster than anything out of Hoover Labs.
It’s news to me, but apparently not everybody enjoyed the antics of Jar Jar Binks. Why? Maybe the ironic juxtaposition of an unashamedly comedic character in a serious fantasy universe was too much for deeply-invested fans to handle. Maybe he lacked the charismatic mysteriousness of Boba Fett or the sex appeal of Bib Fortuna. Or maybe he was just fucking annoying.
For whatever reason, unwanted Jar Jar merchandise can still be found in bargain bins everywhere. Unwanted, that is, until now.
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