visit this url casino card game download mac slots gamble online from usa online roulette bonus internet casino download if you want online slots real money in america where to play online usa internet casinos online online gambling 2014 blackjack casino real money online roulette for cash slot machines bonus online blackjack play for cash play for free flash mac casinos

They spell "Programme" the long way, so you know it's all class.In recent weeks, I’ve had the absolute pleasure of playing a supporting role in The Vine: Donkey Kong Audio Programme.   I must insist you have the absolute pleasure of listening to it.

Not into video games?  That’s okay, neither are the hosts.  Think of it as the legitimate front for crude but classy conversational comedy.  It’s a mammoth production, a huge labour of love, and brimming with the warmly familiar, silky-smooth voices of Rubber Chicken alumni.

Be warned: Emmy-winnng hosts Chad and Hyle are not the most tactful gentlemen, and tend to use masturbation jokes as punctuation.  You’ll hate yourself for laughing, but oh, you will laugh.

Subscribe on iTunes

RSS Feed

I’m told the website you’re currently reading has an audio programme too.  It’s not ringing any bells, but I’ll look into it.



“Can you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame street?”

……………………-”Sesame Street” theme song. Written by Joe Raposo, Jon Stone & Bruce Hart

Ever since Sesame Street debuted in 1969, this question has haunted us relentlessly. This says a lot for our obsession, because we weren’t born until the 80s. For you see, while the universally beloved children’s show cheerfully asks the question, it never actually divulges the answer.

How do you get Sesame Street?

Today we’re going to find out the only way we know how: by asking every awesome celebrity who will care to listen. Meanwhile, Aussie Ben will try to combine them into a single coherent answer. A recipe for madness, or a salmon cake of bitter disappointment? You be the judge.

Continue Reading »



Mailbag: Jesus Wants Spiritual Fruit

Posted on February 28th, 2006 by Ben K

Continue Reading »



Amazonian Ethel

Posted on December 1st, 2005 by Alastair Craig

Reader Reviews from TRC’s Resident Puritan Nutcase

We’re sorry – we really don’t know how it happened, but what’s done is done and there’s no use making excuses. Somebody has introduced our favourite fictitious fundimentalist critic, Ethel Roberts, to Amazon.com.

Yes, Ethel Roberts. Crusader for the good and champion of the pure. She emerges now, shielded with self-righteousness and sething with strongly worded paragraphs, here to let the world at large now how she feels about not only this, but also that. Especially that.

Come with her now as she snaps on the rubber gloves and runs a finger around the inside of Amazon.com’s Reader Reviews section.

Continue Reading »



The Rubber Chicken scores an interview with Darren Gargette, a former tester for one of the world’s most secretive video game development companies, to uncover The Truth behind upcoming Xbox 360 titles Kameo, Perfect Dark Zero, and perhaps even a few unannounced Rare projects…

Back in the Rarenet days I made a very good friend, “Boggy”. He is also known as Darren Gargette, who is incidentally in the credits of Grabbed by the Ghoulies, Donkey Kong Country 2, and Sabre Wulf as a beta-tester (but I’m pretty sure his name is actually Boggy and he really is some sort of fat polar bear who seriously believes that being dive-bombed by a bear on a sled with sharp pointy runners is a good way to fix stomach ache).

I managed to score a secret interview with said (ex-)beta-tester about his time at legendary videogame developers Rare, and this is that interview.

Continue Reading »



Mailbag: Highly Adjective Noun

Posted on September 18th, 2005 by Mister Bung

This edition is dedicated to The Other Guy From “Wham!


Still doing a wonderful job of not being George Michael.

Continue Reading »



History’s Greatest Procrastinators
(Next week: History’s Greatest Masturbators)

A forward by Alastair “HappyBob” Craig, Editor of TheRubberChickeN64.

  • In 1964, Brian Wilson began work on The Beach Boys’ would-be magnum opus: Smile. A direct answer to The Beatles’ Sergeant Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, this classic album could have changed music history were it not aborted following a series of complications and a nervous breakdown from Wilson himself. The Next Big Thing in rock ‘n’ roll was reduced to a mildly interesting footnote in musical history… until now. In 2004, Brian confronted his demons and recorded the album from scratch, creating a wonderful, timeless masterpiece that was well worth the wait. Finally, his vision was complete.
  • Throughout the 1990s, writer and comic mastermind Douglas Adams struggled to organise a film adaptation of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. “The Hollywood process,” he once remarked, “is like trying to grill a steak by having a succession of people come into the room and breathe on it”. Sadly, Adams passed away before he could see his pet project become a reality, with the movie showing few signs of progress… until now. In 2005, The Hitchhiker’s Guide finally saw completion in the capable hands of Garth Jennings, who created something arguably worthy of the late Adams’ memory.
  • In 2000, Adam “The Phantom Spoon” Severgnini was bored on a bus trip to high school.  To pass the time, he penned a review of Rare’s newly released Perfect Dark for TheRubberChickeN64, the newly-launched Nintendo review / silly animation hub we started together.  He passed it to me on the assumption that I’d type it up that afternoon. Tragically, I forgot, and his notes sat ignored in the bottom of a box under my bed… until now.

Ladyfolk and gentlebeings, you are about to witness history itself unfolding. We are gathered here today for the WORLD PREMIERE of that famous unfinished masterpiece, five years late, but forever ageless in its beauty:

The Phantom Spoon’s EXCLUSIVE Review of Perfect Dark: GoldenEye 2!

Continue Reading »



You may have noticed that Something Awf The Rubber Chicken’s poll has been closed down for nearly eight billion years, displaying the mysterious message “closed while we search for a poll service that hasn’t whored itself to pop-up adver-

Okay, the message is way too long, and is a lie anyway so I’m not going to bother trying to remember the rest of it. Instead, here’s the dirty and somewhat obvious truth: nobody’s been searching for anything. In fact, the “administration” here (hahahahahahahahahahaha) has gladly forgotten all about its extinct poll the same way they cried their crocodile tears about September 11th, and then partnered with Halliburton during the privatization of Iraq. You’re probably wondering where Chad is. Well, he’s in an oil derrick outside Fellujah (Microsoft Word Dictionary: “Elijah?”).

Continue Reading »



Pants Dants Exposed

Posted on September 19th, 2004 by Alastair Craig, Chad McCanna, and Ben K

“We arent really new. We’ve been kicking like a mutated cow for nearly 3 years now, and I think we’re finally recieving the attention we deserve.”

Ahh, Rare-Extreme. “Sharply written”, “witty” and “reliable” are but a few adjectives one could easily place next to their name with the aid of any functional writing instrument or word processor. The technology is there, and we aren’t in a position to stop you.

Over the years R-E have made contact with many reliable inside sources, promising the secret behind Banjo-Kazooie’s infamous “Stop ‘N’ Swop” feature (but never revealing it), confirming Perfect Dark 2′s appearance at E3 2002 (which never showed it), and even scoring a tour of Rare HQ. Yes, they’ve done it all. We at The Rubber Chicken might have had occasional creative differences with Rare-Extreme, but it doesn’t mean we don’t respect them as fellow journalists. Sometimes a gentleman must swallow his pride and give credit to his enemies. In the following exposé, we hope to establish their credibility once and for all.

Continue Reading »



Today is the sixteenth day of the month – Do Something Controversial Day – a day in ‘Chicken town usually reserved for childish and spiteful pranks. But this time, we’ll make an exception.

As many of you know, several key members of The Rubber Chicken have past affiliations with the fan community of videogame developers Rare. Somewhere along the way, our former websites fell into rivalry with the kids at Rare-Extreme.com. But today, my friends… today we concede defeat.

Rare-Extreme recently obtained the impossible: a guided tour of Rare HQ itself, and posted a fascinating, well-written talisman of fine journalism on this incredible once-in-a-lifetime experience. To show there are no longer any hard feelings between us, and to make up for any past bitterness, we offer the following reconciliatory plug their fine website. Check it out now, y’all.

Rare-Extreme’s EXCLUSIVE Tour of Rare HQ